Fourplay by Da' T.R.U.T.H.

Stay away from them fly girls, Shorts up to their thigh girls

Lookin like cowgirls, makin’ your eyes twirl

I know their lips drip like honey, but their promiscuous

I recommend you keep your ears from the vicious lips

To my sisters stay away from them fly misters

Don’t be deceived by the way they got riches

God’s richer, God’s wit cha

I know sex seems like a big deal, but God’s bigger

God’s bigger yall

Peace

God takes some sunshine and adds some rain

and puts them together in His own special way

and "What does He get"? "I know... It's a rainbow".

Takes the prettiest colors that could ever be

And paints the heavens for us to see

and "What does He get"? "I know... It's a rainbow".

It's hard to imagine these colors so bright

Came out of a sky filled with thunder and lightning

But God has the power to take something frightening

And turn it into a beautiful sight

God takes the darkness of a stormy day

And lights up the world with a dazzling display

and "What do we get"? "I know... It's a rainbow".

God's keeping His promise when He gives us this sign

Of His unending love for all mankind

and "What do we get"? "I know... It's a rainbow".

It's hard to imagine these colors so bright

Came out of a sky filled with thunder and lightning

But God has the power to take something frightening

And turn it into a beautiful sight.

Flashback

So... what is a flashback? I think (just from the top of my head) that it's a glimpse of scenes/events from the past. I had a flashback the other day. And you know what surprised me? I am the same person 6 years ago that I am today. All the rough times I've had and all the disappointments; all the lessons I should have learned have come and gone and now 6 years later I am the same person. I think this is very unfortunate. The same issues I had then, I have now; the same propensities, stressors, insecurities, and weaknesses I had then, I have now. FML!!!!!!

Balance

As usual, I don't know where how I'm gonna get to where I'm going but I have an idea of where I'm going. So let's see how this goes.

So... the following is a hypothetical situation. A man (let's call him Wade) lived in a town called Fulcrum. Although he lived there all his life, he was never able to instinctively follow all the customs of the land. He ate when the people ate. He drank when the people drank. He bathed when the people bathed. However, there was one custom that he tried his best to follow, but always came up short.

It was the Ceremony of Tossing. Every citizen of Fulcrum was given a specific number of stones, according to their personality. These stones were perfectly spherical and smoother than a baby's bottom. At the beginning of everyone month, the town of Fulcrum would gather together, pair up, and perform the Ceremony of Tossing. Wade knew that he would probably mess this part up again, but he was determined that this time was going to be different. This time he would figure out the key to successfully perform the ceremony. He watches as each pair approaches Balance, the crater where they toss their stones. Wade watches as they toss and at the end of their tossing, Balance would light up and tremor.

When Wade's turn came, he and his partner approached Balance. He began tossing the stones just as he saw those before him do. His demeanor was almost identical to those around him. He tried his best to successfully perform during the ceremony. However, when he and his partner had tossed all their stones, there were no lights and there was no tremor; just utter silence.

In a heap of frustration, Wade marched over to the Master of Ceremonies and asked "Why do I fail every time? I want to succeed." The MC simply replied "Check your pockets, son. Check your pockets." When Wade checked his pockets, he realized that all the stones that he thought he had thrown into Balance were still on him. Although he tried his best to create balance and give, at the end he realized that he was in fact holding everything back.

60 years later, Wade is in a nursing home, ready to die. He believes he has suffered enough pain and exile for his lack of success in the Ceremony of Tossing. Then, a little girl (about the age of 9) walks into his room and hands him a stone. He looks at the stone, then back at the little girl and asks "Why are you giving me your stone? The ceremony has not yet come." Then the little girl replied "I know, but I want you to have it." Then it hit him. The reason he never succeed was because he never truly gave.

The lesson Wade learned was this: just as real as the stone in his hand was is how real the stones he gives should feel in the hands of others. However, when you never really give a stone, it always comes back to you.

Lonely

So... Been a while. I'm gonna attempt to say what's on my heart, even though I don't really know how it will come out. I was thinking about writing the lyrics to the song "Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely", but the words never really appealed to me. I might write a poem or just some words. We'll see.

So time and space have a place where they can reminisce about the times when they were just babies. Mother, father, sister, and brother all have a place where they can just be a family. (okay i'm done with this poem thing. not really feelin' it.)

So I'm feeling all alone. And yeah I have friends who love me and care for me, but I still feel lonely. That type of lonely you feel when you're around lots of people and still feel like you're the only person in the room. Then when someone comes over and asks you how you are (because they can obviously see the sadness on your face), you laugh it off and say that you're fine. Or you say that you'll be okay and say pray for me or something.

I just participated in a wedding and the family atmosphere present was so strong that I felt like I was part of the family. I felt the warmth and everything. So now I'm sitting here at my computer trying to make sense of the fact that I have a host of people who care for me and I still feel alone. I started feeling this way today. Some of the bridal party had brunch at The Lawrence's house. People slowly started to leave and I felt more and more alone. On the way back, I felt so alone.

I started talking to God about it and felt Him telling me that I need to include Him in my life. I don't really include Him. That might be it. I feel like I'm searching so hard for something to do that I can't even do the things that I need to do. I don't know what to say anymore. I just hope that this is a phase and that I don't feel like this for the rest of this week. I need motivation. I'm so alone.

Drawing the Line

So it is possible that this is going to be one of the my most confusing, inconclusive posts ever. I have difficulties drawing lines, whether it be social lines or moral lines. Well... Let's begin shall we.

When I think of drawing lines, my mind goes to balance more than it goes to separation. When I picture the line that I'm drawing, I see a scale that says 0% - 100% on one side and 100% - 0% on the other. Drawing a line on this scale shows how much I lean to either side.

A few examples:

1) When in a relationship (nothing above the friend line), some guys find themselves flirting with anything in a skirt. With no real intention for friendship or more than friendship, they flirt just because they can. I believe their line has been blurred.

2) Many Christians believe that anything that is even associated with the Devil should be shunned. Other Christians and non-Christians believe that they can partake of things associated with the Devil, as long as their own beliefs are not affected. So where do you draw the line?

I don't know where to draw the lines in my life. Lately, I've heard a lot of talk about demonic forces influencing the music industry. I remember making a comment about Christians and how they shouldn't associate themselves, nor partake, nor encourage/support others who choose Satan-led lifestyles. However, you never know which artists are accepting these influences. That's one side. Another side of the story is the fact that some songs by some artists are so beautiful, inspiring, and powerful. Even though they may have been influenced by the Devil (and I'm not saying that every secular artist is Satan-inspired), the joy/comfort I personally receive seems to outweigh the negative. Also, some people believe that to be isolated from what's going on in the world, as far as music is concerned, is absolutely WRONG! My dilemma (and where I find it difficult to draw my line) is "What should I or shouldn't I listen to? Where do I draw the line?"

That's all for now. Maybe I'll do a part 2.

RUN!

Before I begin, I must say that I love this blog. I get to free-write and it doesn't have to make sense. I hope it make sense in the end.

Run. Dictionary.com defines this word with the following: "to go quickly by moving the legs more rapidly than at a walk and in such a manner that for an instant in each step all or both feet are off the ground".

Due to the circumstances, I'm gonna just say what's on my mind, without all the fluff that I like to write with. We, whether you believe in Jesus or not, no longer have time to walk around and do that things we do. We must begin to run. Not to say that we need to hurry. No that's not what I'm saying at all. However, what I'm implying is that we need to understand that (feeding off the definition above) we need to start running because we need to prepare for flight. The definition above says that when you run, you move your legs in such a manner that all or both feet are off the ground. We need to sore to new heights and this cannot be accomplished by walking.

Now to a more spiritual note. The Bible talks about running the race set before us. We are to, like an athlete, discipline our bodies into subjection. All the Christian race is one where anyone that runs wins a crown, we need to start running as if our lives depended on it; as if we need to win first place to win the prize. I wish I were able to put what I'm abstractly thinking into the right words.

We don't have time to look at the beautiful scenery while we run. We don't have time to pick the flowers and take quiet strolls by the river. We don't have time to stop and check out the guy/girl sitting next to you. We only have time to run. Our energies should be completely focused on running. And the amazing part about the Christian race is that you will find people running with you. So if you're looking for a wife and you don't know where to look, just run and you'll see the others that are running alongside you.

This was a very inadequate attempt to share the ramblings on my brain. However, if there is one thing I have learned, it is that running is usually your best defense (unless God tell you otherwise).